The ABC’s of Metal Detecting

I was wondering which article to post, as I promised to delve into the archives to bring you a little bit of metal detecting humor.  Then I saw this pic posted on Facebook, and it reminded me of a humorous little article where I briefly mentioned having to choose between a guy or metal detecting.  I hope this brings a smile to your day–

The ABC’s of Metal Detecting:

A-is for Annoying, as in those folks who come up to you on the beach and say “If you find a gold ring, I lost it”, followed by smug laughter. Oh gosh–we’ve never heard that one before–Comedy Central is on our speed dial, just for you.

B-is for Bragging Rights.  Go on, you’ve earned ‘em. Facebook, Twitter & the forums are waiting!

C-is for Crosshair, but if you’re blind like me, you can’t see it anyway.

D-is for Discrimination, as in, I don’t want to detect with him/her because they wear mismatching Camo.

E-is for Eternal, as in the Eternal search.

F-is for Ferrous, in other words Junk. Sometimes F may also be used as part of an expletive, for example, “F**k this hole!”

G–is for Gold. Is elaboration necessary?

H– is for Holes, let’s fill them in when we’re done please!

I-is for Iron (see F)

J-is for Jewelry. The home front never complains when you come home with that in your pouch.

K-is for Karat.  Best when it follows the numbers 14 or 18.

L-is for Leave-a-rite, as in “leave it right there”.

M-is for Mysterious, like that signal that was there just a second ago.

N-is for Non-Ferrous, hopefully similar to G.

O-is for Obsession, just tell people “It’s a healthy hobby”.

P-is for Problem solving, i.e. How the heck am I gonna get around them roots and under those rocks to my target?

Q-is for Quiet, something you don’t want to hear in your headphones.

R-is for Re-check! There could be something else in that hole.

S-is for Skunked—hey…it happens.

T-is for the TREASURE we know is just waiting for us. Will they still call us obsessed if we find it?

U-is for Unkempt, how we look in the field.

V-is for Vacillate.  Something we tend to do when trying to decide which site to hunt.

W-is for Why, as in when you find something, WHY is it the first thing everyone asks is “How deep was it?”

X-is for your X. The one who made you choose between them or metal detecting. Hence the reason they are an X.

Y-is for Yelling and heard frequently at good detecting sites.

Z-is for Zilch, as in a bad day detecting. But still better than a good day doing most anything else.

Happy Hunting!